My new glasses...

Yes I know I spent too much money on them, but tell me and Adam what you think how they look on me. Go to his blog and check out the picture, then comment on his and mine. Thanks!

Blogging is so cool...

I was talking today with Adam about my session with the therapist and how writing can help me deal with frustrations and such, and I told him about an anonymous comment that really helped me out. And I thought how cool it is that that person could be either right down the road from me or in Oregon. Who knows! Anyways, thought I would mention that, and also gives me another chance to thank whoever it was it commented. Thanks!

Top 3 Most Amazing Football Play Ever...

You won't believe your eyes!!!

Psalms...

42:5-6a:

"Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God."

I'll post some more Psalms soon.

"To the Cross I look, and to the Cross I cling. Of it's suffering I do drink." - part of "Sweetly Broken" - Jeremy Riddle

Worn...

Ever feel like your talking to the wall. Right now, I feel like I'm yelling, shouting, screaming at the top of my lungs, with all the breath in me, pleading for an answer. But none comes...

Ever had those moments where you feel like crying, but you can't for the life of you. You think, this is so ironic, I almost want to laugh at the predicament and disposition I'm in, but its all too entirely real and too painful...

You feel like your breathing your last, that you've come to the end of your sense's rope...

...to the point where your just going through the motions.

You ask, God am I speaking english, can you hear me, do you comprehend?
I am so over fighting, so done with trying to do it on my own.

I was reminded today of a story of where someone said this, and it was like God told this person, "that's all I wanted. Let me take over."

Well I've said this, but it hasn't happened. Will it? Maybe. I hope so.

Theology gets into your brain sometimes, and scares the shit out of you. Am I really called to follow You? Do you really have something big for me. I'll take something small if I have to, just release me. I'm so tired of going elsewhere for the short term release. Deliver me. I am so fragile. Help me. Please. I'm begging, asking, praying. I'm not sure what else you want. ANSWER ME!!! I need Your help. Please. Please. Please.

I know my idols, I know my addictions. That's the first step, now free me of them.
I'm done. Somethings got to change. I can't keep on like this.

And I'm not going to medicate. I know your all I need. Your all I hope in. Please God, save me, deliver me.

Breath in, breath out.

It's over, just help me get out. Please.

"Set Me Free" - Casting Crowns:

It hasn't always been this way
I remember brighter days
Before the dark ones came
Stole my mind
Wrapped my soul in chains

Now I live among the dead
Fighting voices in my head
Hoping someone hears me crying in the night
And carries me away

Chorus:
Set me free of the chains holding me
Is anybody out there hearing me?
Set me free

Morning breaks another day
Finds me crying in the rain
All alone with my demons I am
Who is this man that comes my way?
The dark ones shriek
They scream His name
Is this the One they say will set the captives free?
Jesus, rescue me

Chorus

As the God man passes by
He looks straight through my lies
The darkness cannot hide

Do you want to be free?
Lift your chains
I hold the key
All Power on Heaven and earth belong to me
(Repeat)

You are free
You are free
You are free

Just In...

Here's us in Tennessee enjoying, without question, THE BEST Peanut Butter Pie. And the best part was that all three pies were FREE!!! So good, I'm salivating right now for some more. Can't wait till next year! Also, notice the cripple is the one standing. Such gentlemen!

Darkness...

It's a somber funny thing waking up in darkness. It kinda makes you feel scared, but then you think, "What am I? Like 5?" But I wonder, why is it that I feel so trapped, so bound up in sin in this type of situations? Then I think, and then I feel relief...

There is, as DC*B would put it, a Remedy...

Why is it that we find it so hard to fall in the arms of grace. Why do we seek ways to destroy ourselves?

Sometimes, I just feel like there has got to be a better way, an easier way.

In times like these I find hope in You, I find hope in Your Son, I find hope in what His blood has accomplished. And I pray, oh how I pray, that what it accomplished will be mine to share. Oh God I pray, deliver me. Deliver me, save me. Pull me through. Jesus, Jesus, how I love you, how I've felt you; please, I'm on my last leg, I'm clinging to You, You're all I've got. Deliver me. Deliver me.

"Deliver Me" - David Crowder* Band:

Deliver me out of the sadness
Deliver me from all the madness
Deliver me courage to guide me
Deliver me Your strength inside me

CHORUS:
All of my life
I've been in hiding
Wishing there was someone just like You
Now that You're here
Now that I've found You
I know that You're the One to pull me through

Deliver me loving and caring
Deliver me giving and sharing
Deliver me this cross that I'm bearing

Oh, deliver me

Jesus, Jesus how I trust You
How I've proved You o'er and o'er
Jesus, Jesus precious Jesus
Deliver me
Come and pull me through
Come pull me through